Our generation is doomed

An Unrequested Opinion — Why Our Generation is Doomed (and How to Fix It)

“Life does not stop and start at your convenience, you miserable piece of SHIT…”

— Walter Sobchak, The Big Lebowski

I’m not what one would call heavily opinionated in regards to complex social issues. I try…Man, do I try…to just keep my nose out of the media and current events. Our generation of “Millenials” are a very entitled and angry group of people. Say anything remotely off the cuff or potentially politically incorrect, and you better damn well believe you’re going to have a petition on your hands filled with thousands of angry signatures. I’m not that kind of guy. I don’t prescribe to causes, and you will never see me at a rally of any kind. Since I’ve been trying to increase my online presence lately, witnessing some of this deplorable and incessant whininess has been somewhat unavoidable.

It all came to a head this morning, though. I was perusing my email account when I noticed an article about Target make its way into my peripheral vision. Out of the corner of my eye, I saw words that read, “Target called sexist and demeaning to women.” With a groan and a roll of my eyes, I couldn’t help but click on the article to see what all of the fuss was about.

Check out the article in question here.

If you’re too preoccupied to click the link above, let me explain the situation to you. Target is selling a “cutesy” new collection of his and her wedding/engagement apparel. A huge crowd of people are apparently getting in a huge uproar because one of the womens’ shirts has the word “TROPHY” emblazoned across the chest. Don’t get me wrong: I think the shirt is stupid, and I would never personally buy it. That’s not why I’m writing this. It was the outcry — people signing petitions, calling for the boycott stores — that made me lose faith in humanity.

People like to throw around words like “Sexist,” or “Chauvinist,” or “Demeaning” like they’re baseballs. Now before you hike up your gender equality pants and ready your indignant fingers to press the “elitist womanhater” buttons on me, let me elaborate a little. People are so irritated that this shirt exists, that they’re willing to put a department store out of business over it!

I’m going to quote guitar virtuoso Russell Hammond from Almost Famous (one of my personal favorite movies) before I continue:

“It’s a T-SHIRT…Do you give a shit about a t-shirt?”

Here’s the thing: Nobody is asking you to buy the damn shirt. If you don’t like it, don’t purchase it. It’s clear that the shirt was made for a very particular TARGET (get it) audience. Some women like to call themselves “trophy” wives. Some of them actually aspire to be strongly desired by someone, and calling themselves a status symbol somehow makes them feel good about themselves. By selling this merchandise, Target isn’t literally coming up to young, impressionable women and telling them “Men only care about your appearance, and you are a conquest to them.” That’s not what they mean. The people who would buy this shirt may be stupid…they may be confident…shit, they may just like getting trophies on PSN. Who the fuck really cares??

Its the sheer scope of the issue that this shirt has caused compared to its utter triviality that makes me want to hightail it off this planet. Humanity as a whole, especially us chubbos in the United States, are the sickeningly whiny and entitled anymore. Things didn’t used to be this way. We didn’t spend our precious time on this planet scouring the internet looking for something to be “offended” by. Don’t pretend to be offended by this shirt. It’s not like it’s a picture of a dude slapping a woman in the face with his penis. If you ARE somehow offended by the shirt…just save your breath. Walk past it. Your incessant complaints only cause more problems.

“BUT, WHAT ABOUT THE KIDS!” People are claiming that by this shirt’s existence, that young girls will get a negative outlook of their own self-worth through osmosis or something. Here’s a thought — if your child asks you what this shirt means, explain it to them. Tell them why you think it is stupid. Encourage open discussion with your little brat. Just by talking more openly with your children will increase their self-worth, and they will develop their own opinions about the fucking shirt.

This whining and complaining isn’t just in regards to feminism, and the angry monster it has morphed into in the past few years. Our generation’s jaded angst has leaked into all sorts of media and entertainment. Take game studios, for one. Game studios are so under scrutiny that a highly reputed developer was forced to CHANGE THE ENDING OF THEIR GAME due to the biggest outcry of nerds in recorded history. I’ll be the first to admit that I wasn’t a fan of Mass Effect 3’s now infamous ending — but never in my life could I have imagined the legendary fallout that would happen because of it. Never has such a thing happened to that extent, where fans of something were so mad at a piece of work that they forced the creator to change it to suit their greedy wants. It’s unprecedented! It’d be like forcing Steven Spielberg to have the velociraptors in Jurassic Park to wield uzis because fans wanted more gunplay.

What is it that compels people to whine and stomp their feet about even the most trivial issues like a word on a t-shirt? What caused this “look at me” mentality of the overly privileged people around us? Why does any of it fucking matter to anybody?

The internet. The internet is the problem.

Humanity has always wanted a voice to air out their grievances. That’s why things like he First Amendment were even established. Yes, we as citizens of the United States are allowed the privilege of freedom of speech. That doesn’t mean you have to abuse that privilege by causing an uproar about everything that happens to float by. The internet is an amazing marvel created by much smarter people than you or I, but our constant connectivity to everyone on the planet is sapping our lifeforce. You can find pretty much every celebrity on Twitter, and say whatever vile thing comes into your head. It’s people’s stupid claims of sexism that causes Joss Whedon to leave Twitter in the first place! People feel empowered at the prospect of being able to say whatever the hell they want to whomever they see fit, and the internet provides them with the ultimate platform for them to do it.

I understand the irony of my complaints. I’m currently adding to this white noise of rage as I type this. I’m literally complaining about the complainers. It’s not lost on me. I just had to express my thoughts.

Yes, the internet (and the media who help perpetuate this garbage) is the avenue mankind has used to expel their pent up fury. What does that mean, though? Should we abolish the internet? Grab our trusty angry mob pitchforks and burn everything to cinders? No, nothing that extreme. My solution for all of this filth-spreading is simple.

CHILL THE FUCK OUT, PLANET EARTH.

There are so many real problems humanity actually should be worrying about. Loss of resources, poor and starving families, the gross income inequality in the US, overpopulation, you name it! We are doomed and stupid and unwilling to change. Our money is shat out in the most unproductive ways, when it should be used to better ourselves and the place we call home. At the very least if Earth itself is completely fucked, then we could invest more time and energy into space exploration or something. It’s all enough to make a guy just want to take the next permanent shuttle out to Mars.

Take a chill pill. Keep away from your screens every now and then. Explore the beauty and magnificence that your lives have to offer. Marvel in the miracle of human existence. By all rights, we should have been decimated by more formidable predators before we could think for ourselves, yet our species has persisted enough to make us into what we are today. Don’t squander that. I’m not saying to be apathetic. Care about things, but only the things that truly matter. We would all be a lot better off if we could follow this advice.

Sorry, I went on a pretty big rant. I’m not usually one to discuss social or political issues, because I can’t stand it. I just think something needs to change. We as humans need to get over ourselves.

I appreciate you taking the time to listen to my complaining. Maybe it will make a difference. Maybe it made you even more angry. Maybe we’re all connected to machines and living in our own made-up dream world. In any event, thanks for reading! Feel free to like, subscribe, and share with your friends.

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